So many days I have sat here at the computer, staring at the blankness of the screen, and trying to think of something to say. I'm going to try today.
My holidays are a blur since I was still in shock and numbness. I spent most of my time with my kids, and went to several parties with family, but found I would just doze off if I could. Below is a light hearted picture of my son and his wife with the hats I made them in their school colors. I still haven't finished Chad's hat.
Once I returned home, the casseroles started arriving. I am unable to make a decision to eat anything, much less prepare it, so this is such a joy to receive. My alpaca association had instigated a Casserole Brigade, and I will apparently receive two a week from different members. I've had to buy freezer containers to divide it all up in and freeze. Now it looks like I won't have to cook for at least two months.
The shock and numbness is gone, but now it hurts more. Sometimes I am just plain scared.
Last Sunday I discovered black mold growing up my living room walls, so called in a contractor. By next week I will have two new windows which will be a terrific addition. I've also bought myself a few new peices of furniture.
Blessings come my way everyday.
I've sold 9 of my alpacas, and may have a buyer for the remaining.
I don't know what I will do about the market, since I have to commit by Jan. 30th.
I thank you all for your loving care and your big cyber hugs, and leave you with this verse:
I have this feeling
there's one more star
up in the sky tonight.
And even though it's far away,
its brightness and warmth still
reach us here to make the night
a little less dark.
12 comments:
Our Prayers and hugs will help ypu through this most difficult time.I have heard many times that you shouldn't make any major decisions right away, but I am sure you will know whats best for yourself. Try to keep busy and know he is still in your heart and will always be. We Love You and are here anytime you need us. Love Kaye
I can only imagine the many different emotions you are feeling right now. My heart goes out to you!
Hugs and more hugs - that's what I send you my sweet friend.
Every day I send a warm hug of caring friendship your way. One day or even one hour at a time is all anyone can do..take care do what you need to do for you.
Always,
Lola
As Lola says.......if necessary, take things one hour at a time. Small steps are probably best right now. You have so many people keeping you in their thoughts and prayers around the country (AND around the world, due to blogs) as well as the local support system you have. I know there will be many valleys you have to walk through, but I also know you will reach the top of the mountain in time. Remember we are always here to listen and to help if there is anything you find that we can do for you.
I often think of what my dad told me once when I was going through a really difficult time. He said, "You know John'aLee I've found something the Lord can't make me do."
"Really dad...what's that?"
Dad "Live two days at once!"
May each and every day you at least find a little joy. I'm sure God has something special in store for you.
Love and Hugs in this difficult time my friend.
God bless, Linda.
hugs, hugs, and more hugs....
I am continuing to remember you in my prayers.
The casserole brigade sounds completely Southern. It is a deep southern tradition to take a casserole to any family that has suffered a loss. I know how easy it is in those times to "not eat" because it seems to difficult to prepare a meal.
Take care and know we love you
Good thoughts headed your way - I know this is a very rough time - but, I am glad to hear the you don't have to think about cooking for yourself and that your friends have taken over that job.
You are in my thoughts -
I'm right there with you!
(((((((((((Linda)))))))))))
My thoughts and prayers go with you. I know there is another star in the sky and it will always be shining for you.
Micki
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