A long story that you may not want to read.

Since my blog is also my personal journal, I have decided to write about my journey back to health.  I'm not quite there yet, but am working very hard at it.

24 years ago, I started having panic attacks and was put on anti-depressants to control them.  It took 17 years to find one that allowed me to sleep through the night, without an attack.  That drug was Cymbalta.  I thought it was working great, but recently I have found that it may be the root of many of the health issues I have developed since.

The major issue is dizziness and dis equilibrium.  The doctors, of course, diagnosed this as positional vertigo, which I have recently discovered it is not.  Other side effects have been a constant increase in weight, even though I had lap band surgery and lost 50 pounds in 2007.  I have gained it all back.  Recently, while dieting and basically eating healthy, I gained 10 pounds in 4 weeks.  What is this all about?  Well, I had increased the dosage of my anti depressant.  My major problem these days is not being able to drive any faster than 55mph without the periphery of my view swirling and floating and tilting, causing me to panic.  I associated this with the change in my vision.  So, I went to see a vision therapist.  There I found out I was in pretty bad shape.  My depth perception was at 20% of normal and I was not able to converge and diverge.  I did not know where my body was within my own environment.  Well, I achieved in 6 months of hard work what they anticipated would take me a year.  In February, my doctor referred me to Pacific Balance Center for vestibular therapy.  Most people who go there have suffered an accident or a stroke.  After speaking for awhile with my therapist, I discovered that I was basically a victim of PTSD.  Post traumatic stress disorder.  I got a concussion in October of 2010.  This may have been the second or even third concussion I suffered, but it is the one that knocked me out.  Then I suffered the shock of finding my husband of 38 years dead in his recliner one morning in December of 2010.  That was followed by many stresses and discoveries, and my brain quit compensating for the double vision I had from 4th nerve palsy.  I had dealt with this condition for years and knew what I could do, but suddenly I could not drive at higher speeds without extreme panic.  A neurologist diagnosed this and sent me back to my optometrist, who referred me to a surgeon to have the palsy corrected through surgery.  For the first time in years, I did not have double vision, but I continued to have difficulty driving.  I am an independent person and this has been driving me crazy!!!

In addition, my health seemed to be suffering.  I was given antibiotics on 6 occasions over the past year, and that wreaked havoc on my system.

Finally, one night while pacing the floor with a horrible case of restless legs, I went on line to research the affect of Cymbalta on Restless leg syndrome.  Well, not only does it aggravate it for folks who already have it, but it causes it.  It also causes vision problems, weight gain, arthritis, high blood pressure, high blood sugar, etc, etc, etc.  This information was not available to us 7 years ago when I first started taking it.

I was appalled.  So I then started a gradual weaning off the drug with the help of some supplements I obtained through a site I found "The Road Back".  Withdrawal from this drug is a bitch.  Fortunately I avoided much of the brain problems, but I have had severe joint pain and extreme edema.  I have now been off the drug for 16 days, but my therapist says it could be in my body for another 4-6 weeks.  He said getting off this drug is the single most important thing I could do for myself.

Vestibular issues are very difficult to diagnose.  Doctors tend to find a bandage to fix the next problem you have.  I spent so much time and money with doctors, and got so tired of hearing them say "We don't know what is wrong with you Mrs. Bylsma".  But here, take this pill, and here take these antibiotics.

I just suffered from a miserable sinus infection but refused to see a doctor.  I let it run it's course.  I am not going to take anti biotics again unless I can't do anything else.

I am so thankful that I found this amazing man who has stood by me and supported me through the past three years.  He endured my breaking up with him three times!!  At one point when we were first dating, I had to tell him I might have to have brain surgery, because that is what the docs were telling me at the time.

This is a little off topic, but when a woman loses the man who has been her constant companion and friend for over 40 years, she not only experiences extreme grief, but also needs to figure out who she is now.  I had a very difficult journey with that, and Terry understood better than I did that Linda needed to find out who Linda was now.  It was a rough road, but I have finally found answers and am looking forward to the next chapters.

Back at it.

I think it is about time I got back to blogging. 
With all the problems I've had with my eyesight, it just wasn't comfortable, but things are improving tremendously, and I think it is time.

 I have been dying fiber again and having a grand time.  I attended a fiber show recently where I bought a fiber blending board, and I'm having a lot of fun blending colors.  I will be coming up with some new yarn designs as a result.

Which is a good segue into the Burien Farmer's Market.  This is a sweet little market, about a 10 minute drive from my place.  I will be vending there and am so happy to be part of a Market again.  Terry will help me to set up and break down.  That was always the part that exhausted me.  He has been working so hard to help me get ready.  He's made new weights for the tend, washed and waterproofed the tent top, and helped me to make a new sign.  

The market is on Thursdays, from 11am to 6pm.  Opening day is May 1st and it is forecast to be 79 degrees.  That should bring the people out.

 Last week we made a quick trip to Lopez Island and took our friend April with us.  Is this the sweetest little church?  I wanted to take pictures of all the churches, but I forgot my camera or it was raining too hard.  That didn't keep us from digging clams and doing some island exploration.

 The Tulip Festival is in full swing in Mt 

Vernon, and here are some fields we passed on our way to the ferry in Anacortes.  These are fields where they are harvesting the flowers.

Last but not least, here are some of the clams we got.  We  wash the shells really good, then steam them, saving the nectar.  I then squeeze the contents of the stomach out of the bug ones, cut them up, and then we freeze them in a quart container.  Enough clams and nectar to make enough clam chowder for at least 4 people.  Next trip to Lopez, we will be going after Dungeness Crabs.

GO HAWKS!!!!!!

 

 

OMG, I am so nervous.  This post will be short because THE GAME starts in 25 minutes.

 

 

Two big boxes arrived for me yesterday, and in them were 14 pounds of baby alpaca rovings.  I received four ribbon winning fleeces from friends in exchange for a fiber tumbler I gave them when I left the farm.  I guess I have lots of work dying this in my future.  It's best to do in the summer, and I prefer to do it outside.  I'm looking for a two burner propane stove for the job.

 

Here is the first skein using the un-dyed white.  I had to do this last night, just could not wait.

To keep myself in line, I have taken all my spinning supplies to storage.  Since I am doing some garden shows, I need to concentrate on sewing my garden aprons.

 

Golly, golly, Queen Latifah is singing the National Anthem. 

Bye.

Missing You

 

I have been missing my blog and all of you.  So many of you are also on facebook, but it is so short.  I'm having to really discipline myself to do this again.  It's not as if I don't have time, since I'm retired now and do what I want.  As usual, I am always starting something.  Right now we are preparing the yard for the garden this summer and to move a pre built shed onto the property to be my studio.  I am so excited to finally have a place for me to create.  I'm still busy doing shows and markets, so the house is usually in a turmoil of yarn and fiber.  Just finding a place to put things away is more than I can face.

 

We've made several trips down to Brookings, Oregon the last several months.  Unfortunately, the last trip was to say goodbye to Terry's Mom.  We will continue to visit there, since Terry has more family in the area, and we just love it.

The last two trips, I have brought home several bags of these rocks.

 

 

We don't have these red and orange rocks in our area, and I am placing them in one of my gardens.  I think they look just beautiful, but it is going to take many more bags to complete the project.

 

While replenishing the bird feeders today, I decided to pick a bouquet of berries and stems for the house.  The rosemary smells so delicious.  I love the smell of rosemary and basil.

I've been decorating some Styrofoam head forms for display at shows.  I think this is working out okay.

Here's a picture from our green house.  This planter originally had a tender crop of spinach, and then all these flowers started coming up.  I've never started petunias from seed before, and here they are as a surprise.

 

Last week Terry and I went to the NW Sportsmen's Exhibition, and I had a blast.  I really wasn't prepared to have so much fun.  We've been looking at trailers and boats and campers.  I bought myself a new red rod and reel, and we signed up for a bottom fishing charter in June.  I'm becoming a fisherman!!!  I never dreamed this would happen.

 

Yes, I am still sewing and working on several projects right now, but I will tell you about them in a later post.

What great Marketing and decor

 

 

Every Tuesday, I have an appointment with a Vision Therapist in Downtown Seattle.  I take the bus in, since my driving is still not safe, and parking down there is out of site.  I always pass this store, which I am so intrigued with.  I finally went inside and asked it I could take pictures.

 

 

I guess I will never go in here to buy clothes, since they are very high end.  But, the décor is fantastic.

They have covered all of the windows with shelves and shelves of vintage sewing machines.  It was difficult to get a good picture of the windows.

They have used old equipment from spinning mills and garment factories as their display tables and racks.

I love all of these old bobbins.

Here is a small window that didn't cause too much reflection.

And, the walls.

My last attempt at getting a picture from outside.  Have you ever heard of a Jones sewing maching?  Most of these are Singers, but quite a few Jones'.

The interior looks like a factory, so the feeling is very industrial, combined with the high end clothing.  Very stylish.  Love it.

I guess it is Autumn

 

As I look out the window on this grey, rainy day, I have to accept that Fall has actually arrived.  It has been so mild so far, and so enjoyable.  I love Autumn for the colors and the cooler temperatures, harvests, and settling in for the winter.

Below is "Crunch", a yard character my kids gave me a few years ago.  He gets blown over in the wind, so Terry chained him to the post.  We were thinking a sign that says "This Home protected by Crunch Security" would be appropriate.

 

 

I bought a drop leaf table at a garage sale for $5, and we used it in the house until we were able to bring my dining room set over from storage.  I removed the table top and sealed the wood with a spray sealant, and it is now a trellis for my Passion Flower vine.  I love it.

You never know what I will think up next.  Alan used to say if you parked your car for too long at our place it would get planted.   Terry is now learning my penchants' for yard art.

 

I just barely had enough corn stalks to decorate the telephone pole out by the mail boxes.  The neighbors love it.

And, I'm turning most of my big planters in to All Season plantings.

 

Monday, I had the wonderful opportunity to meet a fellow blogger for Coffee.  Jean of

moved to this area from Tennessee a couple of years ago, and this is the second time we have met.  Thank you Pat  for hooking us up.

 

Thursdays have become the best day of the week for us in my new life.  We have a friend who is a personal chef that comes over for dinner every Thursday evening.  During the summer, these dinners took place under the Gazebo and consisted of barbecue and sometimes a fire in the pit.  Now they have moved inside.  April has tenants who have joined us for these dinners, and they are a couple in their 20's.  April is 40 something, and Terry and I are the oldsters.  So, we have three generations represented here, and we have a blast.  Chase is a world class white water kayaker and keeps us entertained with his antics.  He says Terry is his hero, he wants to grow up to be just like him.  I feel quite honored to have these wonderful friends gathered here each week.  They have so enriched my life.

 

Oh, and before I forget, I have re-opened my Etsy store.  I have yarns and hats listed at this time, but I'm doing it slowly.  And the name?  Fiberfabrications, of course.



Return to Lopez Island and other stories

Well, here it is a stormy, rainy Saturday afternoon, and it's raining like I have not seen in a long time.  So, I've done some knitting, some sewing, cleaned the kitchen up from the mess we made last night with our Thursday night dinner party that was on Friday.

And now, I will blog while DH watches football.  I haven't even gotten dressed today.  Yesterday I vowed to spend the day doing nothing, and I'm succeeding to a slight extent.

 

Last week, Terry and I went to Lopez Island again, because the tides were good for clam digging.

When I dig for clams, I get down on my hands and knees, right in the hole, and really enjoy myself, as you can see.

Each day we filled a large bucket 3/4 full.

 

 

 

 

I'm trying to show off how dirty I am here.  I hosed it all down when we got back to the cottage, with me still wearing it, and left all the clothes in the sun to dry for the next day.  In fact, where we stay is so secluded, we stripped all the way down to our birthday suits and hosed off before we went inside for showers.

 

 Below, I am filling the bucket with clean water so the clams can spit out all the sand.

After clam digging, we rowed the boat out and set 4 crab pots.  The next day, we pulled up 14 crabs!!!  Then we dug clams again.  We have lots of crabfeeds and clam chowders in our future.

We didn't do any hiking this trip.  All the work we did really wore us out.  We went into the Village for lunch the first day, and I felt surreal.  It was like being on a movie set.  Folks were walking along the streets, riding bikes, and one lady went buzzing by on her brand new Candy Apple Red Moped.

No body lives like this.  It's like a dream

Meanwhile, I have been spinning up a storm, and have finally started to enter items on my Etsy Store.  It is Alpacalady.  I'd like to change it to Fiberfabrications, but I can't.  Oh, well, I will be known as the alpacalady by many people for a long time.

Here is the link to my shop:  https://www.etsy.com/shop/alpacalady

I will be a vendor in a Fiber Show coming up in October, which I'm excited about.

Here is the link if you are interested in attending Fiber Fusion Northwest.

http://www.fiberfusion.net/

 

On another note, I raised a Stevia plant this year.  I pulled it up by the roots and hung it in the Man Cave to dry.  I later learned that it is a perennial, so I  bought two more plants.  I took about one Tablespoon full of the dry leaves and placed them in a coffee filter.  I tied it shut and boiled it in a cup and a half of water.  Like making a simple sugar.  I'm keeping it in the refrigerator and it will provide sweetener for my coffee for a week.

Finally, I don't think my niece reads my blogs.  This is the finished quilt top for her that I just completed this week.  Now the hard part begins.  And, I have three more quilts to get made.  If it's a long rainy winter, that won't be a problem.